Tangled Web We Weave

     If you are reading this, I want to thank you for allowing me an outlet in this crazy life.  So much changed this weekend and I have a lot of praying to do to figure out where I go from here.  
    
     Mr. Battle committed adultery again.  This time there are no excuses.  His meds are good, his head was on straight, and he had enough cognition to cover his tracks and create an alibi.  His indiscretions in the past were forgiven due to his out of control mental illnesses, drugs, and alcohol issues.  So now what?

     I needed some time alone and rather than me getting the time I needed, he grabbed a loaded gun and pointed it at his head.  I called the police (because they know and care for him) who were able to talk him down after an hour of work.  They told me to go inside, so I did.  I called my brother in law who deployed with Mr. Battle to see if he could come up as Mr. Battle would stop to think before ending his life in front of him.  My sister wasn't home and he had the kids, so I called my minister to see if he could babysit (he lives in the area) and as I was giving him directions, I thought he did it.  It sounded like he actually did it.  

     There was a desperate scream, "STOP!"
     And then there was a loud "POP!"

     My heart stopped.  I started rambling in fear and panic, my minister started praying.  I tried to see outside without leaving the house, but I couldn't see anything.  It felt like hours went by before one of the cops came by the front door.   

     Thumbs up.

     I let out a long breath I hadn't known I was holding.  

How did we get here?  How did this happen?

This time was way too close.

     So now what?  Mr. Battle is in the mental hospital.  I have more praying and soul searching to do.  Kid Battle is having tantrums over small, insignificant things that her sweet little 6 year old mind can process.  

We have fallen backwards at least three years.

     Please pray for my family.