Last week we had an intake meeting with Operation TBI Freedom (btw, if you haven't heard of the program before, LOOK INTO IT!) During the interview process they try to find out what areas of need you and your family have that aren't being met such as finances, medical coverage, counseling, support, etc. It took me a few minutes to come up with a need that we have because we really are in a much better situation than a lot of veterans. When I finally realized what that need was, it hit me pretty hard. Kid Battle! Kid Battle is far beyond her years due to all that she has been exposed to as far as hospitals, doctors, emergencies, first responders, etc. I made an executive decision a couple months after school started for her to be in all day kindergarten and enrolled her in before and after care in an effort to minimize her exposure to so many adults issues. She had gotten to a point where she would ask me on Sundays, "Mom, what appointments do we have this week?" No 6 year old should have to be this way or feel this way, and it became glaringly obvious with this question that she was there! She was at that point where we needed to make a choice. Do we continue down this path where we rob her of her childhood, or do we intervene and fight for her? I chose to fight for her. Every once in a while she will ask what appointments we have, but we choose to be honest but short with our answers. Mr. Battle is no longer in crisis and he recently graduated the residential PTSD program for the second time. We are in the calm again. However, we still have a lot of doctors appointments, counseling appointments, and situations that she doesn't need to be exposed to.
Now we are facing the summer where my options for care for her to keep her out of the PTSD/Veteran/Post Battle life are down to a whole lot of things we cannot afford. Summer camp at the preschools? $250 per week. Babysitters? $15 per hour. Day camp? $445 per week. Sleep away camp? $950 per week. Nanny? $500 per week. Live in nanny? $200 per week plus annual $8,000 fee plus $400 finder fee. Are. You. Kidding. Me?! I remember being paid $20 a NIGHT for babysitting 3 kids! My mom owned a preschool for 18 years and charged $125 a week for school agers in the summer program, which included all meals and activities! That was only 4 years ago! I've been looking for a live in nanny who can be here during emergencies and to possibly lessen the financial blow by providing room and board, but it seems there aren't very many options. I know there will be those people who say "Your kids are your biggest investment, why wouldn't you want to pay more for them?!" I have news for you. Parents have a whole lot of out of pocket costs. Let me put it this way. Do I pay the babysitter (who is still in high school, can't drive, no education, and barely any experience) $15 per hour to supervise my insanely independent 6 year old who preps her own meals, bathes herself, entertains herself, and will even put herself to bed when tired before 8PM---OR do I pay the mortgage payment, car payment, insurance payment, feed crappy pre-packaged food such as ramen when she needs to be eating GF because she will drop weight? (BTW, Kid Battle is as tall as an 8 year old and only weighs 40lbs even though she eats more food in one sitting than three 15 year old boys). This really is the predicament parents face.
So, back to my issue. We have some appointments weekly that she cannot attend (counseling, marriage counseling), some appointments bi-weekly that she shouldn't attend, and some monthly that she also shouldn't attend. What am I going to do this summer? Do I expose her to more hospitals and doctors and this painful, chaotic PTSD life? Or do I cut corners in other areas that are important in order to afford that $250 per week for summer camp?
Last night we were in the ER until 0100 again. Mr. Battle was experiencing shooting pains in his abdomen, light headedness, and nausea. Kid Battle fell asleep in the chair in the room he was in. She has been in the hospital and ER with us so often that she actually feels at home there. So not okay. Don't get me wrong, I don't want her to be afraid of doctors and hospitals, but for this to be home away from home because of her daddy's health problems is heart wrenching. I received a response to an ad I posted paying $100 per week for a live in nanny room and board included, her profile says she charges $250-$400 per week, but she said she is interested in showing us support because of our situation. I'll be contacting her to see if she is okay with a lower wage (most weeks will be fewer than 20 hours of care) than what she is asking. I don't enjoy doing this, but we cannot afford $250 per week.
If ya'll know anyone in the Colorado Springs area in need of a live in nanny job who is willing to take $100 per week, and is dependable, trustworthy, kind, experienced with kids, let me know!
God Bless you all, and may your paths be lined with beauty.
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